Positive Bystanders: Check In. Step In. Get Help.
Most of us want our nights out to be about having a laugh, enjoying good music and spending time with friends. We want everyone to feel safe, comfortable and able to enjoy themselves. However for some it doesn’t work out that way.
You might notice things like:
- Someone who looks drunk, confused, uncomfortable, or upset being led away alone.
- Someone slipping something into another person’s drink.
- Someone hanging around looking for the drunkest or youngest people at a bar, party, or event
- A very drunk person in a taxi with someone sober taking them home.
- Or just a gut feeling that something isn’t right.
You might wonder if you’ve got the situation wrong, whether it’s your place to get involved, or what you can safely do to help.
You don’t have to be certain that something is wrong before you check in. Trust your instincts, take action safely, and get help when you need it.
This is what being a positive bystander is about — looking out for each other and taking small steps that can help prevent harm. If everything’s safe, people usually appreciate you looking out for them.
Your voice can change what happens next
Check In. Step In. Get Help.
Safety FirstYour safety is incredibly important. You can’t help someone else if you are not safe. If you have friends with you, inform them what you’ve seen and get their support in addressing the situation. If you think it won’t be safe for you to approach the situation head on, make sure you or your friends keep an eye on the person you’re worried about and report it.
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Check In
Check in with their friends if the person you are worried about is ok.
Let them know what has worried you about the situation
“Is your pal ok?”
“I saw your friend being led outside, just wanted to make sure they’re okay.”
“I noticed somebody keeping an eye on your friend, do you know them?”
Step In
Take safe action if someone is at risk.
Approach calmly: “Are you okay?”
Offer to stay with them, help them get to a safe place, or guide them back to friends.
Distract or interrupt if someone is behaving inappropriately, even a small intervention can prevent harm. “Hey, I’ve no seen you for ages! Come grab a drink with us.” “I think your pals are looking for you”
Check politely what their relationship is: “Hey, is this a friend? Just checking everyone’s okay.”
Always prioritise safety, yours and theirs.
Tip: Stay calm and confident, your presence alone can stop things from escalating.
Get Help
Alert venue staff, bar or event security, or responsible adults around you.
Call 999 if the person is in immediate danger or has been harmed.
Help the person contact friends or family they trust.
Support them without judgment, let them know they’re not alone.
Remember: You don’t have to do it alone, getting help is still being a positive bystander.
